This is going to be another one of those embarrassing posts. The only reason I’m writing it is because Stevie said that if I didn’t, she would.
After 2 months of good health, I found myself back in the hospital. Such a bummer, because the jokes about my last hospitalization when I almost killed myself from drinking too much water had just started to die down, (remember here – Inflamed In The Membrane).
This time the problem was much more serious, or at least I thought it was. It came on slow, like a dull ache. I followed standard operating procedure and ignored it. On day 2 the pain increased, so I mentioned it to Stevie in passing. She raised an eyebrow. On the 3rd morning it hurt. I complained and Stevie, knowing me well, suggested we go to the hospital. I declined. By 2pm I began having dizzy spells. That was it. Stevie called the cab and we were off to Clinica Arequipa, which we were told was the best and most modern hospital in town.
We checked into the emergency room and the doctor started the evaluation.
Let’s see, how would I explain the pain?
My left ball hurts. My entire left groin hurts. Deeply. Aching. Pain. Can barely walk, pain.
<Sigh>… I told you this was going to be embarrassing.
The doctors began the investigation. Pee test. Poke test. Lots of questions.
And, of course, who could forget the ultra-sounding of my testicles.
All tests came back negative. No kidney stones. No hernia. No testicular cancer. No unseen blockages.
Then came the obvious question,
Doctor – “What have you been doing for the last few days?”
Me – “Umm, well, I’ve been sitting. Sitting on an uncomfortable piece-of-crap chair. For like, three weeks now. About 10-12 hours a day. Oh, except for the last couple days. I had a good 35 hour sitting session, about 23 hours of which was complete, un-interrupted sitting. Would that cause a problem?”
Diagnosis – yes, that would cause a problem.
Apparently, sitting hunched over on a crappy chair for long, extended periods of time over 3 weeks can indeed cause muscle cramping in a certain area that then escalates into serious inflammation and a full seizing up of the entire lower region of one’s manhood.
I know, it was a first for me too. Who knew? My best friend Simko probably said it best on g-chat later that day…
“Only, and I mean ONLY you, could get injured from sitting in a chair”.
Fair enough Sisko Kid.
The doctor gave me some pills, told me to go home and stay horizontal. So now I’m working on the couch.
The good news is that during all that sitting, I was working, and we were able to successfully launch a brand new Outdoorplay website.
This was a huge project for us. We’ve expanded from being one of the top kayaking retailers in the country to branching off into new categories, like outdoor clothing, rock climbing, camping gear, and more. Now, not only can you get your kayaking gear at ODP, but you can get a tent, sleeping bag, headlamp, climbing gear, bike rack, or a patagonia down jacket!
We’ve got a good amount of gear in stock at our Hood River warehouse now, and over the next 6 months we’ll be significantly increasing the offering.
Need something? Save 20% as a Sprinter Life reader. Use this coupon at checkout…
Coupon Code – SPRINTER
Note: This coupon excludes items on sale and some vendors. Send me an email if you have a specific request.
I’m really proud of Outdoorplay. I started this company in my garage in 1995 with 2 kayaks and a small loan from a great friend (thanks Leslie). Over the years we’ve managed to grow organically (without investment capital or acquisitions). We’ve got a great team of people who work really hard, and I’m excited to see where this next step takes us.
And so, our time in Arequipa comes to an end. We’ll be hitting the road in a couple of days, heading up to the Sacred Valley to hook up with our good friend Marco at his Adventure Destination Resort, Cola De Mono (The Monkeys Tail). I did mention that Marco has a pimp pad in a prime location in the Sacred Valley, right?
Off we go.